FUTBOL

Jenson Jenson Jenson, what were you doing on Sunday? Did no one ever tell you that the best way to show your support for your national football team was not to stand on the English flag while having a pre-race interview? Maybe it's just me, but by age 14 I knew that a nations flag should never even be allowed to touch the floor, nevermind be used as a mat.

Other than that, how the hell did England manage to give that game away? Sure, Zidanes' dying minute goal was pure magic. But as one of the highest paid players in the world you would have thought that Becks could have made a slightly better attempt at the penalty. And that backward pass to James a minute into injury time? WTF? But on top of that I'm sure a top-flight keeper should know that the rule is 'play the ball not the man'.

I'm not even English, but even I felt gutted at the way they lost their Euro 2004 opener.