You're squeezing my mellon man!



I would happily commit heinous crimes if it meant I could locate even a single South African gem squash in Britain.

I'm struggling through a completely irrational desire desire for that golden flesh. When I was a kid I almost severed a finger (I got as far as bone) trying to cut one of these in half with a dagger. You may find it strange that I was using a dagger but I was camping and all men, even small ones, need a big knife when camping. It's conditioned into us while watching Crocodile Dundee as children.

After spurting claret all over the place and then bursting into tears, I found I didn't much fancy gem squash so much anymore. That stayed with me for a number of years after the incident. Thankfully I'm over it now.

Completely aside, due to the fact that Ananzi mail are pissing me off with their fucking daily newletter I've completely ported across to Gmail now. Anyone who has my MSN details, please update my contact address to ian(dot)r(dot)wilson(at)gmail(dot)com.